TGI Hurry the F UP!

Is it Friday yet? NO? Hurry up already. While this week hasnt been particularly bad, its been annoying to say the least-from start to finish.

Monday, out of the goodness of my heart (and the nice weather) i decided to walk our spoiled brat dogs; all at once. Walking a combination of about 130lbs at once is no easy feat. SO, when I saw our house in sight after a short while, i thought I was out of the woods. No no Nanette! Out of nowhere two dogs show up and Oscar and Charlotte went bOnkErS! Oscar took off, and took me with him. My legs flew out from under me, hurling me into the street, and cracking my cranium on the ground, leaving me with a lazy eye for a night (not sweet) two blackened eyes in the morning, and a stiff neck for two days. Sucks.

Tuesday was supposed to be our "date night" and, against all rules, was cancelled. Why you ask!? SONsOFBITCHES AT&T strike again. What can I say? Their UVERSE is so tempting. Its like eating chocolate and drinking champage in the bathtub (at least, this is how john explains it to me so I understand the magnitude of greatness). So when I said, FINE, we can switch the internet but NOT the sattelite to them, he was very pleased (and willing to overlook all the grief we have had with them). To wind up this story, let me put it to you this way: after 3 days of not getting the new modem to work, 2 tech guys not showing up, and a cumulative of 4 hours of hold time, AT&T is getting their modem (after a good 'Office Space' pounding by John) UPS'ed back to them with a gift from Oscar---of the turd variety.

Jump ahead to today: I left the house without my glasses. I cant tell you why, because I am sure there is no logic to it, but not wearing my glasses during the day, I feel like I have downs syndrome. Its like I understand how Corky must have felt on Life Goes On. I cant function properly. Is it because one of my senses is comprimised? Nevertheless, it has me off. I forgot my glasses because, yet again, our puppy Charlotte has another Vahina infection, and I had to take her to the vet. Before you get all "oh, poor girl", listen: this bitch is so spoiled she cries if we dont let her into bed by 6am, and once she is in bed, she suddenly has rigormortis and stiffens up so there is no room to move. Not only that, the said infection causes her to pee quantities close to that of an elephant. And no, not only outside. ALL THE TIME! In the house, on my shoe, on the sofa- everywhere. So dont go getting emotional. She's fine. Plus, she got a badass e-collar that makes her look like a flower that hasn't bloomed yet. Its pretty rad- I'll post later.